heartbeat

OK, it's official: Sam's brother or sister is due August 10th. Or thereabouts. We saw the heartbeat today.

Of course, after this past summer, we are still cautious at this stage: we saw a heartbeat then too, and then two weeks later heartbreak. But we're optimistic.

But in the meantime, the very nice ultrasound tech printed a separate blurry picture just for Sam, which he examined very closely this evening with his magnifying glass (he is convinced of the magical power of magnifying glasses and microscopes after weeks of nightly readings of Flotsam). Sam is having mixed feelings (we don't bring it up that often, but he's known for a while); he sometimes talks about things he will show or teach the baby, but the other night as I was leaving his room after snuggling in his bed for a while, he asked why I keep having babies. Just one more, Sam, I told him, our family will have you and your brother or sister. But why? he said, I don't want to have another baby, I want to be the only baby. I gave him lots of kisses and reassurance... mindful of Penelope Leach's analogies between things commonly said to first children when discussing siblings, and how such things would sound when spoken by one spouse to another ("I like having you as a wife so much that I thought I'd get another one! You can help me take care of her!") and glad we have lots of time for him to begin to work out his feelings.